Why did i call for him? Well he was the one to send the letter asking to see me. I know it . was just as friends. It hurt like fell having him see me like this. Made me think... A lot. I am glad he is happy but that bath really made me want more, if friends act like that then i can understand my long conserne about his friendship with her.
He bought me some different stuff to help my travels, the rose i am unsure what to make of? I mean, why not just a stone, why a rose? I will keep it close as the magic will help my travels a lot. I felt broken when i left, hid outside crying my eyes out. I decided to move away, the shadows seem to cling to me, i dont even know for how long i was out this time... I remember arguing and a dark cave, then i woke in his arms, the cold metal of that shining armor making my head hurt even more. My reflexes seems to be on edge as he softly pointed out that i did not need the dagger i was holding against his throut. I moved away not sure what to make of it all. He told me what had happened... He made me sound like some crazy person... Again making me think...
He wanted to help me. His logic seemed fair so i let him, its not like i feel the light myself anymore.
I surely regrettet that help, sure he did not enjoy the bite to the hand but he should have warned me. I have only felt such a pain once before and that was also by the hands of a paladin. It left me all drained, almost staggering through that blasted sand, a little walk, it felt like a life time... Why did Jas take the time to clean my fathers grave? Need to send him a letter to thank him or well just use the necklace. He said he would keep the ring. Well finally got to that goblin city. He told me to take his room and he would sit outside until i woke, just to make sure i kept safe. Why? Well maybe thats a silly question he is of the light after all... I was like that myself before.
I could not sleep, like always as of late but this was different , my head was full of thought about the ladt couple of months, Irenya was right and for the first time i can understand her words. Seems the light burned deeper than i first though, leaving me with a clear mind.
It is not like i do not hurt... That paladin just burnef some persepective into me, taking away the dark doubts... For now at least.
What have i done to myself... How did i ever get so blind and stopped listening to the light, if i had just percived the warnings non of us would have been hurt, but i guess all happens for a reason right or at least thats what the paladin tried to tell me.
I have a lot of wrongs to right but i am a thousand miles away from beeing anyway near as strong as to return... Maybe someday the wound has healed and the scar my only reminder?
Etaine falls asleep, the dark figure of a woman hisses from outside the city.
"Naive girl, you will still fall, they all do"
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