At home in Westfall

I cannot sleep... Just lay here watching him... His sleep is so restless so disturbing...
He hurts... Reike, me and now Hira...
I am afraid he will break soon, run away or do something more stupid to be free.. He feels it is all his fault, that he can do nothing right...
I will loose him it is only a matter of time...

I did it again... it let myself anger... i should not have
But to know how they hurt him... But i am no better...

He says he wants it all to be simple for the two of us to be happy, to have his friends back...
That will never happen... It is never that easy...

Well all i can do is try to show him happiness and love until he runs away for i know he will do something like that, he will never want me or Reike or Hira hurt and this conflict where he is in the middle he is drowning.

Maybe i should give him the necklace back and tell him that he needs not tell me anything and i will not ask?
I do trust him after all...

I hope we will be able to talk tomorrow. I did not even dare to get to close... yet i miss him.

Will i ever get him back or is he already lost to me.

What to do, how to help i am so lost... my world is crumbling so his must must be shattered... Maybe i should talk more witj Irenya she seemed to understand somewhat..?


- The light guide his steeps and keep his soul forever safe.